■3rd Person POV■

Kuguri along with some of his colleagues walk into a suki restaurant. Today Kuguri's division having a get together.

Amaha sits in one of the chairs and Kuguri sits next to him. Just a Seco later, a woman, one of Kuguri's colleagues comes and sits next to Kuguri.

Woman: can I sit here?

Kuguri just nods his head, doesn't really care about who sits next to him. As time passes and they start eating, the woman next to him was trying to get Kuguri's attention.

Amaha notices that that woman keeps on asking what food that Kuguri wants and probably wants to take it for him, but Kuguri ignored that and he only drinks by himself.

Kuguri decided that he doesn't want to eat because he wants to eat with Y/N at home. It's been a month and he enjoys his time with her at their dining table.

Woman: um, Kuguri san... here I poured you another glass...

The woman offers the glass of sake to Kuguri because he kept refusing the food she gets for him. Kuguri was about to refuse because he already drinks a bottle along with Amaha, but the other colleagues told him to drink it. He sighs and takes that and gulps it down.

But then he takes out some money and puts it on the table. He then gets up and Amaha looks at him.

Guy1: what is it Kuguri?

Kuguri bows his head and looks at his colleagues.

Kuguri: sorry I'm going home first... I want to eat dinner with my wife...

At the mention of his wife, his colleagues are all surprised. They knew he is married but never thought he would be someone who would go home early to meet his wife.

They feel bad for telling him to drink the sake poured by the woman next to him, and that woman clenches on her shirt.

Kuguri excuse himself and walks out he feels a little light headed and decided to call a cab. Amaha watches as his friend gets on the cab and decided to chat with Y/N, telling her that Kuguri is probably a bit drunk.

Kuguri is a bit tipsy, he actually can't hold his liquor. The moment he arrives at his apartment complex, he pays the driver and walks up to his place.

Kuguri presses on his Passcode and opens the door. He pushes and walks inside and closes the door behind him. When he's taking off his shoes.

Y/N: Naoyasu san, welcome home...

Kuguri looks up at Y/N who's walking to him. Y/N got the message Amaha sent her, he told her that Kuguri is drunk and hasn't even eaten.

Y/N: are you dizzy? I made miso soup... it could ease your hangover...

Kuguri stares at the woman in front of him. The woman that he met again 2 months ago after years of not knowing her whereabouts. The woman that he hurt because he doesn't let her explain things to him. The woman that he married because of a deal last month.

Remembering the patch that they made, sends a tugging feeling inside his chest. Kuguri is afraid that Y/N is secretly hating him, afraid that she'll eventually leave him.

In his drunken stage, and not in control of his mind at the moment. Kuguri leans in and rests his head on Y/N's shoulder, making the woman surprised.

Y/N: N-Naoyasu san... are you o-okay?

Kuguri, doesn't want to lose her...

■Kuguri's POV■

My head feels light and I rest my head on her shoulder. I can feel that she stiffens.

Do you hate it?

Just then I feel that she pushes me back, making my heart sting thinking that she hated that I'm touching her.

But then, Y/N holds my hand and I looks up at her

Y/N: let's get you to sit on the sofa...

She looks worried, maybe she thinks that I'm completely out, well she's not wrong if she thought so.

Y/N leads me inside and makes me sit on the sofa. I watch as she walks to the kitchen and grabs a glass and gets water for me.

What do you feel about me?

I always wonder about what she thinks or feels about me. We never actually talk it out. Though we met a couple of times before this so called marriage, we never talk about the past.

I never tell her about my regret...

The smell of her sweet shampoo hits my nose as she crouches down in front of me and puts the glass on the table. Seeing her so close to me but out of my reach, and thinking that she might actually go someday, my mind is a mess.

I don't want to lose you...

Y/N: here drink some water Naoya-

She wasn't able to finish her sentences as I pull her up to me and hugs her. I could feel her body stiffens in my arms.

Y/N: Na-Naoyasu san!?

I bury my face at the crook of her neck, wrapping my arms tightly around her small frame, afraid if I loosen up a bit she will fade.

I'm sorry...

Kuguri: I'm sorry...

I could feel her body stiffens.

Y/N: Na-Naoyasu san, wha- you're drunk... p-please let go of m-

Kuguri: I regret what I did to you...

I could hear her breath hitches

I'm sorry...

Kuguri: I regret not listening to you...

I'm sorry...

Kuguri: I regret hurting you and not being around when you lost your mom...

I'm sorry...

Y/N: Naoyasu san...

Kuguri: I regret not being able to wipe your tears when you cry... I'm sorry...

My heart is pounding but I could feel that so does hers.

Kuguri: I regret that I'm too late when I notice that I hurt you and.... you left... I'm sorry...

I'm sorry...

Kuguri: please... don't hate me...

I could feel that she clenches the front of my shirt.

Y/N: y-you... hurt me...

Dub Dub

I push her back and sees the tears on her face.

I did...

Y/N: I hate you...

Please don't...

Y/N: I should have hated you... but... why?... why? when I see you again... I feel no hatred at all towards you...

Dub Dub

■Y/N's POV■

My hands are clutching the front of Naoyasu san's shirt. I was surprised when he suddenly pulls me into his arms in his drunken state.

He suddenly starts apologizing and talks about regretting what he did. He asked me not to hate him and I can't hold back anymore.

I wanted to hate you...

Y/N: you didn't listen to me... you (sobs) don't let me explain... I should have hated you...

I should have...

Kuguri: Y/N...

His voice sounds weak as he speaks. His face is so close to mine, it's practically above my head because I can feel his breath on the top of my head.

Y/N: you left me... and (sobs) and you're not around when I needed you the most (sobs)... I thought I will hate you after that..

That's what I thought...

Kuguri: I'm sorry Y/N...

Y/N: but then...

I remember the day I saw him again at my uncle's restaurant. How for all of those years I thought I wouldn't even want to look at his face because I hate him, turns out that's not what happens.

I don't hate him...

Y/N: when I saw you again after all those years... I realized that... I don't hate you... it's not hatred (sobs) what I feel is a disappointment... I'm just... sad...

I push him back and look up at him. His eyes showing how much he feels bad right now.

Y/N: I was confused when I saw you that day... sad... and all... but then, you decided to propose the deal... making me conflicted about your feelings and my own... (sobs) how could you make me confused about my own feeling?

Naoyasu san flinches but then pulls me into his strong arms again.

Kuguri: I'm sorry Y/N... I'm really sorry... please... forgive me.... that day... when I saw you again... I was surprised and... happy...

His voice is so gentle and his hand rubs a small circle on my back.

Kuguri: seeing you again after all those years... my mind went blank because... I'm just glad I got to see you...

Naoyasu san moves one of his hands to my head, stroking my hair before pressing me closer to him.

Kuguri: I want to say something but I'm afraid that you'll be uncomfortable... but then, I hear how your uncle trying to set you up with his customer and I... don't like the idea...

Why?

Naoyasu san pulls back and lifts my face so I look up at him.

Kuguri: that day... as I saw you look troubled, it seems like my sanity left me and I just blurted out and... asked you to marry me... rather than letting you marry someone else's...

Naoyasu san leans his head against my shoulder again. The warmth of his body spreads.

Kuguri: please forgive me... I'm really selfish, aren't I?...

My heart still hurts sometimes whenever I remember how he looked at me back then, turning his back on me without giving me the chance to explain.

But...

I move my hands to his back and bury my face on the crook of his neck, making him straightened his posture.

Kuguri: Y/N...

Y/N: I told you... I forgive you...

I already did... from long ago...

I can feel Naoyasu san rests his head on mine and brings our body even more closer.

Kuguri: thank you... Y/N...

I was upset...

But never hate him...

And today, listening to all of his words...

At his drunken state...

I know that....

What he says is all honesty...

And I can't help my heart to open up...

More than it already has...